ack simply isnt able to ignore it. Jacob was very careful to think of other things when he was near me. Of course, after last night thats all out the window.

I cant believe it. Leah Clearwater! Suddenly, I remembered Jacob speaking of Leah and Sam, and the way he acted as if hed said too much  after hed said something about Sam having to look in Leahs eyesevery day and know that hed broken all his promises. . . . Leah on the cliff, a tear glistening on her cheek when Old Quil had spoken of the burden and sacrifice the Quileutesons shared. . . . And Billy, spending time with Sue because she was having trouble with her kids . . . and here the trouble actually was that both of them were werewolves now!

I hadnt given much thought to Leah Clearwater, just to grieve for her loss when Harry had passed away, and then to pity her again when Jacob had told her story, about how the strange imprinting between Sam and her cousin Emily had broken Leahs heart.

And now she was part of Sams pack, hearing his thoughts . . . and unable to hide her own.

I really hate that part,Jacob had said.Everything youre ashamed of, laid out for everyone to see.

Poor Leah, I whispered.

Edward snorted. Shes making life exceedingly unpleasant for the rest of them. Im not sure she deserves your sympathy.

What do you mean?

Its hard enough for them, having to share all their thoughts. Most of them try to cooperate, make it easier. When even one member is deliberately malicious, its painful for everyone.

She has reason enough, I mumbled, still on her side.

Oh, I know, he said. The imprinting compulsion is one of the strangest things Ive ever witnessed in my life, and Ive seen some strange things. He shook his head wonderingly. The way Sam is tied to his Emily is impossible to describe  or I should sayher Sam . Sam really had no choice. It reminds me ofA Midsummer Nights Dream with all the chaos caused by the fairies love spells . . . like magic. He smiled. Its very nearly as strong as the way I feel about you.

Poor Leah, I said again. But what do you mean, malicious?

Shes constantly bringing up things theyd rather not think of, he explained. For example, Embry.

Whats with Embry? I asked, surprised.

His mother moved down from the Makah reservation seventeen years ago, when she was pregnant with him. Shes not Quileute. Everyone assumed shed left his father behind with the Makahs. But then he joined the pack.

So?

So the prime candidates for his father are Quil Ateara Sr., Joshua Uley, or Billy Black, all of them married at that point, of course.

No! I gasped. Edward was right  this was exactly like a soap opera.

Now Sam, Jacob, and Quil all wonder which of them has a half-brother. Theyd all like to think its Sam, since his father was never much of a father. But the doubt is always there. Jacobs never been able to ask Billy about that.

Wow. How did you get so much in one night?

The pack mind is mesmerizing. All thinking together and then separately at the same time. Theres so much to read!

He sounded faintly regretful, like someone whod had to put down a good book just before the climax. I laughed.

The pack is fascinating, I agreed. Almost as fascinating as you are when youre trying to distract me.

His expression became polite again  a perfect poker face.

I have to be in that clearing, Edward.

No, he said in a very final tone.

A certain path occurred to me at that moment.

It wasnt so much that I had to be in the clearing. I just had to be where Edward was.

Cruel,I accused myself.Selfish, selfish, selfish! Dont do it!

I ignored my better instincts. I couldnt look at him while I spoke, though. The guilt had my eyes glued to the table.

Okay, look, Edward, I whispered. Heres the thing . . . Ive already gone crazy once. I know what my limits are.And I cant stand it if you leave me again. 

I didnt look up to see his reaction, afraid to know how much pain I was inflicting. I did hear his sudden intake of breath and the silence that followed. I stared at the dark wooden tabletop, wishing I could take the words back. But knowing I probably wouldnt. Not if it worked.

Suddenly, his arms were around me, his hands stroking my face, my arms.He was comfortingme. The guilt went into spiral mode. But the survival instinct was stronger. There was no question that he was fundamental to my survival.

You know its not like that, Bella, he murmured. I wont be far, and it will be over quickly.

I cant stand it, I insisted, still staring down. Not knowing whether or not youll come back. How do I live through that, no matter how quickly its over?

He sighed. Its going to be easy, Bella. Theres no reason for your fears.

None at all?

None.

And everybody will be fine?

Everyone, he promised.

So theres no way at all that I need to be in the clearing?

Of course not. Alice just told me that theyre down to nineteen. Well be able to handle it easily.

Thats right  you said it was so easy that someone could sit out, I repeated his words from last night. Did you really mean that?

Yes.

It felt too simple  he had to see it coming.

So easy thatyou could sit out?

After a long moment of silence, I finally looked up at his expression.

The poker face was back.

I took a deep breath. So its one way or the other. Either there is more danger than you want me to know about, in which case it would be right for me to be there, to do what I can to help. Or . . . its going to be so easy that theyll get by without you. Which way is it?

He didnt speak.

I knew what he was thinking of  the same thing I was thinking of. Carlisle. Esme. Emmett. Rosalie. Jasper. And . . . I forced myself to think the last name. And Alice.

I wondered if I was a monster. Not the kind that he thought he was, but the real kind. The kind that hurt people. The kind that had no limits when it came to what they wanted.

What I wanted was to keep him safe, safe with me. Did I have a limit to what I would do, what I would sacrifice for that? I wasnt sure.

You ask me to let them fight without my help? he said in a quiet voice.

Yes. I was surprised I could keep my voice even, I felt so wretched inside. Or to let me be there. Either way, so long as were together.

He took a deep breath, and then exhaled slowly. He moved his hands to place them on either side of my face, forcing me to meet his gaze. He looked into my eyes for a long time. I wondered what he was looking for, and what it was that he found. Was the guilt as thick on my face as it was in my stomach  sickening me?

His eyes tightened against some emotion I couldnt read, and he dropped one hand to pull out his phone again.

Alice, he sighed. Could you come babysit Bella for a bit? He raised one eyebrow, daring me to object to the word. I need to speak with Jasper.

She evidently agreed. He put the phone away and went back to staring at my face.

What are you going to say to Jasper? I whispered.

Im going to discuss . . . me sitting out.

It was easy to read in his face how difficult the words were for him.

Im sorry.

Iwas sorry. I hated to make him do this. Not enough that I could fake a smile and tell him to go on ahead without me. Definitely not that much.

Dont apologize, he said, smiling just a little. Never be afraid to tell me how you feel, Bella. If this is what you need . . . He shrugged. You are my first priority.

I didnt mean it that way  like you have to choose me over your family.

I know that. Besides, thats not what you asked. You gave me two alternatives that you could live with, and I chose the one thatI could live with. Thats how compromise is supposed to work.

I leaned forward and rested my forehead against his chest. Thank you, I whispered.

Anytime, he answered, kissing my hair. Anything.

We didnt move for a long moment. I kept my face hidden, pressed against his shirt. Two voices struggled inside me. One t